Monday, December 24, 2007

"Umm, what were you thinking?" Awards

Category #1: "That's gonna hurt" Award
Eagles fans do some crazy things sometimes: Spread ashes on the field, associate with Gov. Ed Rendell in the stands, throw snowballs at former Cowboys coach, Jimmy Johnson (hey, they bounced off of his teflon-like hair), and yeah, not liking a really cheesy Santa. HOWEVER, I don't think any of them would give much thought to jumping 17 feet to iminent peril.
"He thought he was going to land in a snow bank," said one witness to the incident.

NewsCenter 5's Todd Kazakiewich reported that the 20-year old man was on a pedestrian walkway heading towards the stores at Patriot Place about 3:15 p.m.

"All of a sudden he jumped. He was screaming on the way down, then he was silent," said another witness.

The man bounced off the pavement below.

"He was unconscious and unresponsive," said Scott Rogers of Foxborough Fire and Rescue.
(H/T: Boston Channel)
He is in serious condition, and I hope he'll recover, but DUDE!!?!?!!? An investigation of whether alcohol was involved is underway. Ya think? (His poor family.)

Category #2: "Girls do stupid things for guys" Award
Here, we have the baby sitter from hell! Below is my fake transcript of their alleged phone call...again, it is fake:

Ruth: "Hey, Chyan? Like, do you want, to come hang out while I babysit?"

Chyan: " the brat asleep?"

Ruth: "Uh-huh."

Chyan: "Like, umm, instead of hanging out, let's go to a bar."

Ruth: "What about the kid? I'm not old enough to get in to the bar, anway."

Chyan: "We can leave the kid in the car, and I'll show my ID, first. They won't card you."

Ruth: "Well, like, o.k. Hey, do you think we could leave the car running with the windows up really tight, so the kid stays warm?"

Chyan: "No, just bring extra blankets. I don't want to waste the gas."
Oy vey!

Category #3: "Word choice is important" Award
Finally, what is in appearance a nice gesture, just sounds all pRonish.

Kyrgyzstan has named a mountain, Mount Santa Claus. Now, if anyone was asking me where I was going, had I a desire to climb a mountain, I'd have to say, "Why, I am going to Mount Santa Claus." That's just not right!

1. He's married.
2. He's really old; he's hundreds of years older than me.

Kyrgyzstan is pretty much Muslim and has named mountains after Communist and Russian leaders in the past. When asked why Santa Claus, a tourism offical states, "We want to develop tourism, and Santa Claus is an ideal brand to help us do this."

They plan an "international Santa Claus" congress in the summer and they also want to hold annual Santa games.

Gotta love it!
(H/T: CNN)


USA_Admiral said...

#1. It would have to be booze or some other substance.

#2. WTF. Unbelievable. Did the parents even know the baby sitter?

#3. LOL. That is just strange enough to be true.

Skul said...

#2, people in serious need of a flogging.

#3, I'm gonna play it safe and not say a thing. I want to live to see the new year.

Anonymous said...

Mount Santa Clause. Ugh. Between you and ChrisC you're making me nauseous at the mere thought of Santa.

Mrs Grim said...

#1 - Dumbass. This is kind of like 'thinning the herd', doncha think?

#2 - scary. That's why I use family members for babysitters!

#3 - Mount Santa Claus? Bwhahaha!

RT said...

Something impaired that guy's judgement.

Yeah, you are better off not saying anything. You need all the teeth you have. HA! ;P'''''''' (kidding, of course)

Hey, I didn't name the mountain. ;) The word choice is a tricky one, eh?

Mrs. G:
Darwin award!

#3---Sadly, it was the first thing that popped into my troubled little mind.