CHOICES

So, I'm thinking of going back to graduate school. I'm thinking the teaching of writing is a good idea. So many doors in education and outside of eduction could open up for me. There is always the reading specialist idea, too--possibly with an ESL focus.

I'm getting itchy. That's a good sign, to be honest. It means I'm feeling better and have a bit more energy these days.

My cousin and I have been corresponding off and on, lately. We have had some papers to sign pertaining to my grandmom's estate, so we felt the need for family. Her part of our family is quite estranged and I don't have any brothers or sisters, so we are kind of able to be open to each other. We seem a lot alike, judging from the emails. I haven't seen her in at least 18-19 years. Her emails sound like me. It makes me laugh. We both fret over the same things, we both don't know what to do with ourselves and have a hard time making decisions. We both have come to the conclusion that we were raised for the era of aprons, sweaters and peal necklaces. Reading her emails reminds me of me, except that she went through with law school. She came to the same conclusions I did right before I made that final decision of whether or not to go. We both like the research and writing. We both like the "helping people" part; it's the slime and people who get into law for the wrong reasons we can't stand. So, I stayed with education, and lately I have been wanting to expand my horizons a bit.

I suck at just about every area of my life and I'm trying to change. Men: I just plain suck. I'm not real nice to look at, so I'm trying to improve my appearance. I have become a lump since I got ill, so I'm trying to become more active. I'm tired of how I teach and the level at which I teach, so I think I might go back to school to provide myself more opportunities. When all else fails in my life, at least I have my brain and I know how to use it (sometimes). I'm looking for schools that don't require graduate exams, because, well, I suck at those, too. Oddly, I'm a really good student and given to mostly A's. (Those tests are dumb.)

I could end up anywhere at this point. It's fun and scary at the same time. I'd really just like to have a life and be around people and have some fun, though. That seems a little more important to me these days. It's better for the heart. (See...can't make decisions.)